Online Magazine For Black Men

My Girlfriend Says I'm Lazy



Can't I get a weekend to myself?

Question from Kendrell:


My girlfriend complains a lot about not going out enough. She says men are lazy and puts me at the top of that group. I try to do things with her on occasion, but I never promised to wine and dine her, or attend company picnics every week. Sometimes - I just want to spend the weekend watching football, or doing "nothing". Why don't women understand this?

-- Kendrell

The Brothas Response:


Hi Ken,

We all know that men and women are wired differently. Women like excitement and romance in their relationships, while men look for comfort and familiarity. If you leave it up to guys, we will take our food, sports, sex and quiet time -- in no particular order.

Spending time with your significant other should be a compromise. You won't always agree on what to do, or where to do it. But it will require that you get off the couch every now and then and participate in things you may not like.

Since you and your girlfriend have taken the steps to explore a long-term relationship, you must have some activities in common, right?

If possible, spend as much time as you can doing the things you enjoy doing together. This will make it easier to deal with those activities you hate doing. Plus -- the more time you spend doing the things you like, the less time you will spend complaining about being dragged into uncomfortable situations.

Women know that men can become complacent in relationships and even expect it to happen. Men are notorious for getting lazy when it comes movies, dining out, social parties, and company functions. We can't seem to maintain those activities for long. But you will eventually have to jump on the compromise wagon at some point.

Your situation is common -- and we think you can easily rectify it by spending exploring the common activities, and sacrificing a little time to do the things she enjoys.

Signed,

The Brothas

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