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Forum Start > The University Cafe > Anything And Everything > What do flings really mean?
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Posts: 1
Location: California
Registered: 9/10/2010    Warnings: 0
What do flings really mean?
Ok here is the situation, in high school there was this guy, we went on one date, but we we re in the same clique so when we had parties we would have really intense make out sessions, but we never had oral sex or intercourse. Well after high school I went to the military got married and had two kids. I recently got a divorce and I ran into him again. It has been like seven or eight years since we had seen eachother and even after all that time we still have this strong sexual attraction. We had talked and he said that he doesn't want anything serious right now, which is cool because I don't either because of my recent divorce so we decided to just have a "fling", So it's been like four months since we've been having this fling, but all we do is have oral sex with each other. He hasn't even tried to have sex with me. I asked him why we haven't had sex with me and he says "we just haven't, aint no real reason we just haven't." That does not even make any sense to me. This has never happened to me before. He is really hard to figure out He asks me for money and other stuff, which I don't give him because he has his own money, but then he says he just playing he just wanted to see if I would give it to him. If this is a fling why is he asking me for stuff. I just want to know what is his deal, why won't he have sex with me. And he aint gay or a virgin.
9/10/2010 19:42 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
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Posts: 205
Location: Texas
Registered: 1/16/2006      Warnings: 0
I must have missed this one!

There are a lot of strange dudes out there but this guy definitely has some issues. I dont want to judge nobody but oral sex IS SEX! He may not be going all the way for different reasons. Maybe he doesnt want to get you pregnant. Maybe he is ashamed of his performance and thinks you might view him different. Maybe he is ashamed of his body and his body parts and dont want to disapoint you. Maybe he is in a relationship and dont want to disrespect it by going all the way and instead will have just oral sex and not call it real sex.

Those are just my thoughts. But this aint really what people call a fling. A fling is just like a regular relationship with dating, sex, spending time together and stuff. You are just having it with someone you know it wont last with.
11/4/2010 20:19 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
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Posts: 11
Registered: 8/31/2010      Warnings: 0

He is a selfish player and you are being played with! Come on Ms Lady! You already know the deal here. You were just exiting what I presume was a painful ending to a long marriage with the responsibility of raising your children minus their father, and basically starting over. Then along comes Mr. familiar who's very presence took you back to the days of care free, exploration of your young, budding sexuality when yuou had no responsibilities for anyone but yourself. So you began to feel desireable again based upon your youthful daliances with him some 9 years ago when you all were teens (young adults). Take off the rose tinted glasses and see that this is a fantasy going wrong or at best in the wrong direction! What does he have going for him other than a flickering tongue? Does he have a steady job or career? Did he complete any educational pursuits? Is he a responsible person and takes care of his business? Or how about this one..... Is he a good person to have in your and your CHILDREN'S lives? Obviously you are not sexually fulfilled by him and you are in a state of physical frustration. Don't stay in this thing long enough to become confused and then talk yourself into thinking that this is something real or special that will change into your dream relationship! You are worth more than a gamers game. Take some time to build your sense of self worth and value so that you won't enter into another physical trainwreck with another man a go through this same futile frustration again. And definitely keep your grocery money in the bank!!

Phenomenal Woman...
11/6/2010 17:49 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Forum Start > The University Cafe > Anything And Everything > What do flings really mean?

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