Forum Start - Register
Name Password Forgot your password?

Forum Start > Culture & Lifestyle > The Men's Room > Dating Black Women
Author
Thread
(First page ... << 1 2 [3] )
passmeashovel
New Member


 

Posts: 4
Location: 
Registered: 7/27/2009      Warnings: 0
I recently read an article about marriage from the Black in America series on CNN, and it was basically an attempt to explain why the black marriage is typically unsuccessful, and offer a possible solution for the problem.
What it failed to understand was that nowadays, it doesn't even seem like Black women and men are even getting to the point where they WANT to be married. Why is this? Why is the black man opting out of marriage? Why are black women feeling like they want to be "independent" and don't need men? If you have answers to this, please help me understand it. I wrote an entire post on it.

Thanks,
__________________
www.passmeashovel.com
An urban woman's relationship site
7/27/2009 22:01 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
doneit
New Member


 

Posts: 28
Location: 
Registered: 1/23/2008      Warnings: 0
It was the black woman that was the backbone of the civil rights movement. Rosa Parks refused to sit in the back of the bus. Black women baked cakes, pies and sold dinners to support the marches. Black women organized and planned the events and all the men had to do was march. Not making any headway, women decided to join the marches. One Sunday JFK and RFK was watching as water hoses were used against black children, black women and black men. That had to stop. After the asssination of MLK, the civil rights movement died. The FBI knew black women were the backbone of the movement and couldn't let them unite again. They had a woman burn her bra and declared she was independent and didn't need a man (women liberation movement). Since the civil rights movement was dead, black women felt a need to belong to something and started listening to that trash.

What is so amazing about it is this. A few years ago, that same white woman looked at her social security check and realized she couldn't live off of that little bit of money and she didn't want to work for the rest of her life. She didn't marry another woman, she married a man. The same woman that started, "I don't need a man", got a man but, that was kept hush, hush.

The recent census report stated 45 percent of all African American women have never been married. The reason being, there isn't enough qualified, eligible or single black men. That reason is purely subjective because, I can say the very same thing, not enough qualified, eligible or single black women. One persons trash may be another man's treasure and vice versa.
8/1/2009 16:04 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
passmeashovel
New Member


 

Posts: 4
Location: 
Registered: 7/27/2009      Warnings: 0
I keep hearing men say that black women want to be independent and act as if "we don't need a man". I don't think that's it. I think what we are trying to say is that we are able to provide for ourselves financially. Emotionally, mentally, physically, we still need our black man- and if our kid's graduation/pregnancy/HIV/prison stats aren't a testament to that fact, then I don't know what is. I think men get offended when we say we can do for ourselves monetarily speaking. Well, I don't need a man's wallet. I need a MAN. And yes- black women are the backbone but I am proud to admit that I need my brotha's legs to help me walk.
__________________
www.passmeashovel.com
An urban woman's relationship site
8/7/2009 20:13 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
doneit
New Member


 

Posts: 28
Location: 
Registered: 1/23/2008      Warnings: 0
passmeashovel

Thank you for the cordial response. Your clarification of independence is well taken.
8/8/2009 22:32 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Wanting2Know
New Member


 

Posts: 3
Location: 
Registered: 8/29/2009      Warnings: 0
I have no problem letting the man take the lead, but I haven't found any real men to do that. I love me some brothas, but I dated outside my race because of the fact the long forgotten the KING that is needed in our AA American home and community. We have lost touch what truly means unity within the Black Community and the black home. I'm not enough a political type of person,but I can only call it how I see it. I am recently working towards a BA degree, but it doesn't mean that I don't have common sense. I know these times and ages people(black people) like to to put emphases on education. I understand and don't want to take away anything that someone has worked hard to obtain, but don't forget the REAL or where you come from. Anyway, wish I would have known more about the true African American Man.
__________________
Waiting to Exhale
8/29/2009 01:17 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
doneit
New Member


 

Posts: 28
Location: 
Registered: 1/23/2008      Warnings: 0
Wanting2know
"I haven't found any real men to do that". Please, give me a break. Real men based upon what standards. Allow me to give you some details. Feme fatale, seductive women, lose women, women without discretion and rebellious women can not be lead. Have you ever heard of Sampson? The strongest man in the world beaten by a little petite Delilah. Hold up sister. Have you ever heard of FASTIDIOUS? Hard to please, never satisfied, nick picky, meticulous, easily bored and squeamish. Oh yeah, black women will quickly state they aren't hard to please but, euphimistically say they have high standards. What is the difference? None. Can't find any real black men? I guess you can find real white men, huh? Maybe the problem isn't black men. Maybe it's black women suffering from ethnic MISANDRY, ethnic GENDERCIDE.

Hold up. Read Exodus the first chapter. Pharoah hired, employed and empowered two black women to kill black male babies. These two women feared God and didn't hurt one black male baby. Pharoah being a white man could not identify with black women. Today pharoah got his white woman to identify with black women and all of a sudden black men are stuck up, arrogant, conceited, inflated ego, UNWORTHY, not qualified. Don't that sound like UPPITY? Wasn't that the type of stuff white people used to call blacks, UPPITY? Now look who's call black men UPPITY and not real. Calling black men every degrading, dehumanizing, derogatory, demeaning, demonizing, demoralizing and insulting term one can think of. Now look, you can't even classify us as men, can't find any real men. Baby sounds like you've been brain washed with the rest of our black women. Let me school you about that junk, can't find any real men. Sister you are calling us every name under the sun to dismiss our person and calling us less than men, little boys and worse yet, savages, heathens, bruts, irreconciliable beasts and not worthy. Sister I recommend all of our black women to look up S.C.U.M., Society for Cutting Up Men. That is the most influential organization within the feminist movement. Everytime you say, haven't found any real men you are fostering the ideology of S.C.U.M. S.C.U.M uses those same words, unworthy, arrogant, conceited, arrogant. Before I end, let me also tell you, SCUM believes all men should be eradicated and eliminated except 10 percent for obvious reasons. They are the number one influential group in the feminist movement. You and the majority of black women run to these conferences seeking empowerment and don't have clue, ain't know body going to give power away or empower anyone unless there is a hitch and a catch. When people claim to empower individuals, they only tell the part of the story they want you to know. Just enough of the truth to make it sound good and the rest is transactional analysis or brainwashing. One last thing, isn't it funny the only person a black woman has power over is a black man? Next time you can't find any real black men, just remember, you are calling us less than a man. Contributing to the eradication, elimination and enslavement of your own people.

I mean you no offense but, black women don't have a clue. I can go on and on giving you examples but, this is the last example. Look at the American Indians. They used to inhabit this country like grass, where are all those native Americans now.
9/1/2009 14:22 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
passmeashovel
New Member


 

Posts: 4
Location: 
Registered: 7/27/2009      Warnings: 0
"I mean you no offense but, black women don't have a clue"- I think that's part of the problem right there. The constant generalizations that we have in place about each other. I am guilty of saying, on the occasion, that I can't find a good black man even though that's a lie. I have had the privilege of knowing several good black men in my day even though for whatever reason they may not have been the right black man for me.

But just as there are so many black women who go around and say that there are no good black men, there are just as many black men out there calling us every derogatory, degrading, demeaning, and every other "d" word you can think of too. You turn on the radio and our own men are calling us b*tches, h*es, and br*ads, so much that you think the words are becoming synonymous with black female. I'm sorry but I don't see any other males of the melanin-deficient persuasion mainstreaming the negative stereotypes of their women as much as black men do.

We are so influenced by the media today and who controls it? Major bureaus put out statistics that say we are lazy, out of work, our men are fathering babies and leaving the women alone, etc. The news shows us robbing and killing each other. It's easy to let that dictate how we interact with one another because that's what we are constantly seeing and hearing.

But I digress. The point of all of this is to say that I think that there are both good black men and good black women out there however we often get so caught up in the stereotypes of one another that we don't allow ourselves to see what the reality is.

As a side note, when I go on to the forums and blogs, etc., I always find the type of brotha online that I am looking for when I am going out. Is that why we can't meet up? because we are all hiding out at home on our computers?
__________________
www.passmeashovel.com
An urban woman's relationship site
9/27/2009 01:37 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Forum Start > Culture & Lifestyle > The Men's Room > Dating Black Women
Pages: 3 (First page ... << 1 2 [3] )

Quick reply
You need to login before you can post.




Mybrotha.COM Home | News | Articles | Relationships | Health | Lifestyle | Entertainment | Business | Jobs & Careers
Quizzes | SpotLight | Message Boards | Sitemap | Links | Terms and Conditions | Privacy Policy
© 2002-2008 Mybrotha.COM   All Rights Reserved
Powered by ASPBB v0.5 PRE
© 2004-2008 ASPBB Developers Team