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Forum Start > Relationships > Sex And Intimacy > Inexpensive date
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Jack
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Inexpensive date
I met a sista at the YMCA the other day. She said she was workign out while her son was in a swim class. She looked like a million bucks, a size 7, coffee with cream complexion, soft and gentle smile, humble spirit, soft voice, very articulate, pretty brown wavy afro, and eyes so white you'd want to put on sunglasses. I have to admit I was a little nervous at first to approach her. Most brotha's would too. She almost had this Halle Berry thing goin, and I dont' make that much money yet. She didn't have a ring on, so I though ok, I'll say something. So I walked up to her just as she was putting her towl around her neck to walk out the gym, and said, "You are so pretty". My hands were sweating, my knees were trembling, that she was going to be rude like we say most of them are. She looked up at me and said, "thanks, but not as pretty as you". Kid or no kid, I asked to take her out that day after that compliment. She told me she only had a couple of hours while her kid went to the play room to dry out, and we could either have a quick lunch then or I could come to the yard party she was having later that day. I chose both. I took her to a restaurant in a little town called downtown Decatur for lunch, then later she piled on the food at her party, all I had to provide was a bottle of wine to share, compliments and companionship. I asked her why she was single, she said "most brotha's tell me that they think I'm with someone already or they simply don't even look my way. Most are attracted to women that have the fake nails, and straight hair, and big bust, and most women just want to be acknowledged." Now, I could have been like most loosers (men that run from responsibility), and thought, sees looking for a father for her son. But truthfully, after she told me she is a single mom, I thought, "If she's not interested in having a father for her son, then she's a very selfesh woman, and I can't date her. I'll keep you'll updated.


(Last edit:: 3/13/2006 13:32)
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3/13/2006 12:47 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
hmurchison
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Sounds like you're knocking the baseballs out the park here. She likes the way you approached here...fearless like a Man intent on wooing a woman should be.

We already know from your posts you're a man of character cut from good cloth. Keep us informed about how things go.
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3/13/2006 13:36 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
VickanS
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Hmmm. Interesting assessment, Jack. Are you saying that a woman who isn't seeking a companion for her child is selfish? I guess I missed your meaning.

Most single sistas who have children tend to not bring up the, "father-for-my-child" topic because they think it scares men away. (Which is weird considering the fact that if they did hit it off, he would have to accept her kids)
3/20/2006 17:43 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Jack
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divine biblical order
Our young boys need fathers is the bottom line, wether a mom wants to bring it up or not. Her first priority is to follow goods rules, her next is to her child, then her romantic desires. Jumping out of divine biblical order is selfish, yes. You heard me right. And any many that looks down on her for wanting for her child or who questions her is selfish as well. He is probably a man that didn't have a father for himself and believes that since he made it without one, then every other child should as well. My thought is that, if he had a father figure in his life, that was useful, while he was growing up, then he views on blessing other little boys would be different. And women who had father figures would definately understand the need.
And we'd all live happily ever after.
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3/23/2006 11:18 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
VickanS
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It would follow then that any woman who doesn't follow the divine biblical order is deemed, "selfish".

Would you also say that most, if not all women (at some point in their lives) have failed to follow the divine biblical order?

Because I've never seen a grown woman pass that test.
3/23/2006 19:01 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Jack
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Most people have failed. If they do not have a spiritual leader to teach them, then how are they to really know what to do? It's up to us, as adults, to seek out a spiritual leader of our own to sit under.


(Last edit:: 4/5/2006 10:23)
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3/27/2006 11:31 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
BigMaroonTiger
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Jack wrote:
But truthfully, after she told me she is a single mom, I thought, "If she's not interested in having a father for her son, then she's a very selfesh woman, and I can't date her.


What makes you think that the kid does NOT have a father? Did she tell you that he does not have a father? Just because she is a single mom doesn't mean she is looking to provide a dad for this kid - he may already have a dad. He may be a little brother in the Big Brother program?

And it is the man who should find the woman. There are already too many women chasing and trying to find a man instead of letting the man find them. The bible says "a man who finds a wife finds a good thing" - I don't take that to mean that everybody is supposed to be married either but I do take it that the man is to find his wife.

I just think that is kind of an unfair assumption to say she is selfish - but maybe you left out some things? If thats the case, forgive my comments.

just my 2 cents
8/18/2007 15:57 Link - Ip: Logged - Quote:
Forum Start > Relationships > Sex And Intimacy > Inexpensive date

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