Online Magazine For Black Men

My Wife's Friends Run My House

A lot of married men can identify with this question.

Question from Jarius:

Thank you in advance for answering my question. Here's the deal:

My wife loves to talk and hang out with her friends and family. Nothing wrong with that, but she often allows them to come to our house unannounced. Sometimes, they're sitting in my living room when I get home from work. My wife may either be in another room doing laundry, or sitting there with them.

It's like they have a free ticket to show up any time they want, and do anything they want. I even caught her friend Lisa going into the refrigerator to get * my * salsa dip.

What's next... giving them keys so they no longer have to ring the doorbell?

-- Jarius

The Brothas Response:

Dear Jarius,

It sounds like your wife takes a lot of pride in friend/family relationships. If those unannounced visits are starting to become a problem, you need to talk with her about it.

You've probably already complained a little, but consider having a serious one-on-one conversation to let her know how uncomfortable it makes you feel. A man's home is his castle and if you can't find peace there, you will forever be stressed.

If that doesn't work, you can always play hard ball. Find your best pair of ripped, grass-stained jeans; put on a pair of socks with more holes than a slice of Swiss cheese; throw on an old baseball cap that's two sizes too small; and sit in front of the television, mumbling the words to "Rapper's Delight" while munching on a bag of tortilla chips.

This might get you banned from the bedroom, but your wife won't be so quick to allow friends into your house anymore.

Embarrassment is a strong motivator to change directions.


The Brothas

Sex & Sexual HealthRelationships
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