She has a college degree - maybe even two. Her job is professional, and her salary is way above the career-field average. She's healthy, spiritual, super talented, responsible, articulate, a whiz in the kitchen, and sexy as hell. If that's not enough, she's got plenty of money and all the material things she wants. (Unless she's a shoe-freak, then she never has too many of those!)

But strangely enough, she's also single.

Being unmarried and unattached is a common predicament among young Black women. The reason it is categorized as such, is because most women prefer to be in meaningful, healthy relationships. It's not a requirement to survive, but moreso a desire to share love with a significant other.

To understand why being independent is a dilemma for women, and a puzzle for men - read on.

How It Started
Due to the absence of biological fathers, or other male influence in their lives, Black women have been tasked with supporting themselves and sometimes their children, while working jobs, attending school, and maintaining a household. As a direct result of this male disconnect, mothers instinctively raise their daughters to survive on their own. Even when the father, or another father-figure was in the home, Black girls were encouraged to do for themselves and never be placed in a position where they had to depend on a man.

This ideology is only one piece of a dual problem in the single Black community. The other part deals with the perceptions Black men have of the independent woman. We'll get into that later.

For the independent Black woman to understand why it is often difficult to find decent men, she must first observe the reasons why male perceptions of independent women are skewed, and also take note of the roles both women and society play in shaping those perceptions.

Are Men That Intimidated?
You believe they are. It is a strong, distinct feeling possessed by many men, and the underlying behavioral characteristics are not all black and white.

Since men are socially reared to be leaders and "fixers", it is difficult for them to relate to independent women. Men are taught to be rescuers - to find the answers and solve problems. To a man, the independent woman doesn't appear to have any needs or problems, and her self-assurance wouldn't allow her to seek help even if it was required.

Some men identify this as competition, or excessive eagerness. The male psyche often associates these conditions with the independent woman, who seemingly has a desire to take over traditional male roles by being her own provider, fixer, and problem solver. In essence, "If she can do it all herself, she must not need a man."