I Like Her, But She's White
Interracial dating is more common these days, but it still irks many African-Americans.
Question from Baron:
I know I will get slammed for this, but I have been thinking about getting serious with a white girl. We have been out a few times and really have fun together. We hit the clubs, shoot pool, go out to eat, and just enjoy each other's company. I've even met her brother and her father.
I never thought I would have feelings for someone who isn't Black because I have always thought it was improper for Blacks to be in relationships with someone who isn't Black. Now I find myself trying to decide whether or not to stay away from this girl or try to make something out of it. I just don't feel like dealing with negative people who may try to label me.
My decision would be easier if there was something wrong with her, but there isn't. She's fun to talk to, fun to hang out with, really sexy, and just all around cool people.
As a strong Black man who loves Black women and loves his race -- What should I do?
The Brothas Response:
Come on B... you do know what this website is about don't you? It's about Black men and BLACK PEOPLE!
(Just a joke, Baron -- just a joke)
Check this out -- If you feel like you have found true love with a white female, then by all means -- do whatever it takes to be happy. Being in a relationship with a special person has no racial boundaries. If you discover a connection with a white, Asian, Hispanic or any other woman -- go forth and build a great relationship.
Be prepared though. We don't have to tell you that many people, both Black and white - will frown upon your relationship. You will get nasty stares; dirty looks; mumbles; grumbles; and maybe a few racial slurs. We are still living in a time where interracial dating in the U.S. is considered taboo, and a lot of folks don't mind expressing their distaste for it. But that's their problem -- not yours. Never allow anyone to tell you that you're wrong, or a "sell out" for dating a white female.
The Brothas always like to encourage the growth and development of relationships between Black men and Black women. But love is love, and when it finds you -- rules and traditionalism are tossed out the window.
Now... if you're only dating her because she's white, or because you have a problem with Black women -- then we have a problem with you!
Many Black men choose to date outside the race when they struggle with self-identity, intra-racism, or other emotional turmoil. If this is you -- own up to it and seriously consider speaking with a social therapist. Talking with someone may help identify any racial and self-reflexive issues you may have.
The good thing is, it sounds like you've found a great girl, and your interest in her is for all the right reasons.
But we can't tell you which path to take. That's an answer you must find on your own.
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