Many people will tell you that relationships of a non-sexual nature between men and women cannot exist. The argument is based on a number of beliefs that usually focus on one or more persons' sexual attraction to the other. Some say that an attraction, or any thoughts of a sexual nature, undermines a friendship that a man and woman may think is totally innocent.

While many purely platonic friendships do exist between men and women, this article examines common elements that influence both men and women who support the theory, and those who do not. Eventually, our observations will answer the elusive question: Can men and women be friends?

The answer ultimately depends on who you ask, and how that person processes his or her connections with others. Women tend to believe that non-sexual, man-to-woman friendships are possible. The male belief system is often a little less forgiving.

To help get a better understanding of the difference in thought processes, let's take a look at a few issues and beliefs from both men and women:

Male Issue #1:
Men will openly acknowledge that they lack the self-control to maintain platonic friendships with women -- especially attractive women. Most men who are physically attracted to a female friend, know how to keep their hands and words to themselves. But social norms tell us if either person carries intimate thoughts, or a physical attraction to their friend -- a platonic bond will always be compromised by sexual tension.

For men, it can be difficult to maintain a friendship with women who are physically appealing. This is when maturity and respect should take precedence. Not surprisingly, many men seek friendships with women they find sexually attractive. This often results in a stressful situation for men who may find themselves in the company of women they can't have sex with.

Of course the media helps fuel this issue. Television shows that feature male/female friendships usually evolve into romantic flings. It happened on A Different World, Girlfriends, Friends, Living Single, and several other shows.

Female Issue #1:
Women who designate men into the 'friend' category, don't usually have problems lusting after them, or controlling sexual tension in the relationship. Women tend to develop close friendships with male acquaintances, thereby eliminating the possibility of a romantic encounter. When this happens, women seldom cross the line.

Sociologists believe that friendship attraction, devoid of sexual attraction, is a type of bond that men and women can experience. Women believe this, and can separate their physical attraction to a man (if there is one), from their desire to be friends. This is especially true if the man has character flaws or personality differences the woman seeks in an intimate mate.

Since there are no predefined feelings or emotions in a male/female friendship, women often choose to be friends with men who make them feel safe. This 'safeness', as defined by women in these situations, says: "This is a male friend with whom I'm comfortable because he doesn't view me in a sexual conquest." In these instances, a woman may know that she loves her male friend and enjoys his company, but not enough to date or marry him. She usually believes that her male friend thinks the same about her.