7 Things You Should Never Talk About On A First Date
We don't want to tell you brothas how to live and love, but some of you are totally off-base when embarking on a first date. No worries though. If you're willing to listen, we're here to help straighten things out.
Follow these 7 simple guidelines to help create a great first date experience, and to help save your skull from certain torture!
- Shut-Up! - Don't talk so much. Period. Especially about yourself. Women love it when you're curious about them and show an interest in giving them attention. They also love a man who can hold a decent conversation. You could talk about politics, your careers, the ridiculous gas prices, or why the Fugees broke up. Doesn't really matter what subjects you choose, as long as they're not boring. They also shouldn't include anything in the remaining 6 steps.
- Sex - Should we even have to explain this one? Sex is a touchy subject with women. They either love to talk about it, or they're uncomfortable mentioning it--especially when they don't know you. If your date likes talking about sex and intimacy, let her initiate it. Never be the first to ramble about your sex life.
Furthermore, if she skews the conversation towards sex, be careful. Don't talk about your conquests, or throw out phrases like "one-night-stand" and "hotel chandelier". You may never live it down.
Should the two of you decide to explore a more meaningful relationship, there will be plenty of time to converse about sex, and what your likes and dislikes are.
- The Ex - For all of you brothas who have talked about your ex's on a first date, either because you hadn't gotten over your ex, or because you were just crazy enough to initiate the subject, we will be sending a professional hit squad to your current location...(free of charge)! We have no problem doing this for you, since you have obviously chosen to initiate your own demise by talking about an ex. This is a big no-no.
Unlike many men, sistas don't usually care about your past. Especially when it comes to your ex's. Even if you have a few indescretions from back in the day, women look for new beginnings. They figure, "He's hopefully concentrating on me now, so all others are irrelevant".
- Personal Problems - You have to remember that she doesn't even know you. Your, "woe is me" sob stories, probably won't have much effect on her. Even if they trigger a response, you shouldn't talk about them.
On a first date, women look for security, stability, and intrigue. If you lose her interest by whining or complaining about how bad life is, you just may lose any chances you had with her.
- Marriage - Believe it or not, this subject is off limits as well. You'd think sistas would love talking about parading down the aisle, but most women go out on dates to have fun and to learn a little about the guy they're spending time with. Talking about marriage and committing your life to her, is inappropriate for the moment.
Wait for a few months to even skirt around this subject. If she asks your opinions about marriage during your first date, give a short, concise answer stating whether or not you would like to be married someday. But don't profess your undying love for her when she doesn't even know what size shirt you wear.
- Money - More than likely, she's got more of it than you do! Money is always a touchy subject and how much you've got in the bank, doesn't really impress women. Sure, there are a couple of money-hungry chicks around, but most sistas are more interested in character and potential.
If you're flashy and got mad cash in multiple bank accounts, it's nothing to be ashamed of. But never make it the center of conversation.
The on flip side, the words "budget" and "poor" should never come up. We're not saying you should lie about your financial situation, but you don't have to spell out your yearly salary either. Don't make her think you're a frugal, cheapo, with no intention of spending a penny in the future.
If you're not big ballin', it's okay. Most women would rather spend time with a brotha who's cool and got a little, than with one who's a jerk and got a lot.
- Anything Negative - What more can we say about this one? If it's sad, derrogatory, mean-spirited, or otherwise negative, don't bring it up. Women like humor, peppered with positive and meaningful conversation.
Don't make the mistake of trying to solve the world's problems though. Good conversation doesn't always need to have a detailed purpose.
Talk about your ideas for a new business, or fun time you had visiting family during the holidays.
But if any part of the conversation takes on a negative tone, changing the subject to something more positive would be in your best interests.
Remember this: These are turn-offs for women on first dates. Some of these subjects may make a little sense after you've spent more time hanging out. So if you want to make a good impression, study the list and make sure to stray away from these 7 no-no's.