Most of us guys don't have a laundry list of desires when it comes to how our wedding ceremonies should be conducted. We usually leave this tedious work to our fiancées while we plan to simply show up for the big party.
Your mate will have a pretty good idea about what she wants, the time of year she wants it, and how she wants her wedding day to play out. But what can you, as her future husband, provide to the planning of your own wedding?
Absolutely nothing! Just sit back, be quiet and allow her to bask in the splendiferous joys of planning her special day.
Okay. That's not really what you want to do. But many of us do just that and for some women, the decision to allow her mate to participate in the planning can be difficult.
Even if she does give you a small role in the planning process, keep in mind that it is still her day. This means, any tasks she gives you should probably be done her way. If you're unsure about how to proceed with a wedding task, ask her. Developing your own way of doing things won't sit well with her and probably won't fit into the overall plan anyway.
Men are creative creatures, but a woman's idea of her own wedding ceremony is something she's carried around for some time. While men don't usually think about weddings until they meet someone they're interested in marrying, some women have this day mapped out during their pre-teen years. It's all a part of how men and women are socially reared.
With that said, remember that wedding planning is a process usually free of male logic, and pulsating with female emotion. The earlier you realize this, the better. If you would like to play a role in your wedding, make sure she knows every move you plan to make. Even better, wait until she gives you a specific chore.
Ask yourself these questions: Does it matter to you whether the wedding is held in a beautiful cathedral, or on a sun-kissed beach? Do you really care if the table flowers are high or low? Does it matter that the guestbook is made of satin? If you answer yes (which is kinda weird, but this is the metro-sexual era, I guess!), then these are three areas you should probably volunteer for. If these things don't matter to you, don't act as if they do. Your lack of emotion and dedication will eventually rear its ugly head and just cause problems.
Try to focus on parts of the wedding planning where you have a chance of adding some value. If she objects, just say, "Whatever you want me to do, I'm there", and the universe will remain calm.